I feel like I am going to faint. Right now. That is so weird. I bet it’s this medication I am taking. Hmm. I can’t wait to not be in pain anymore. Well, physical pain at least. I think I am going to always be in pain emotionally. Isn’t that such a sad thought? I wish it wasn’t true. But I feel like I just wouldn’t know how to function if I wasn’t hurting emotionally. That makes me feel so stupid and ridiculous. It should too. This is absolutely awful. Whatever. I can’t change the way I have functioned for years. It’s like a bad habit. Easy to form, impossible to break. Story of my life right there. Wrong decisions. And bad timing. Haha. Actually, it really isn’t funny. I forgot where I was going with this. Isn’t that sad? I had this whole thing figured out. Haha. Things never go as I plan, yet I keep planning anyway. Why am I so stupid? When will I learn? Never, probably. I feel dead inside. Dead or lost. I don’t know. I can’t wait till school starts now, I am going to be buried in school work. I won’t have time to think about any of this. That sounds nice. All though AP Calculus. Oh God. I still haven’t finished my summer reading. How sad. Meh. I don’t care. I just don’t care anymore. That is so sad. So unlike me.